Sunday, May 31, 2009

Alert: Don the Cat Judger's Cousin Frequents Poison Girl

Although she is not in Don's immediate family, this girl (we do not know her name unfortunately...or do we?) is still somewhat of a threat to the world of normal conversation. Be vigilante as she might approach you or your friends and attempt to "sell" you to one of her friends. She may also frequently bring up the fact that her "sale" did not work. If caught in the situation there are three steps you must take.
  1. Engage her, but continue to talk about her as she stands right next to you, as she will not be aware of any of this.
  2. Bring up the subject of drinks (she will offer to buy you some, and this will get you at least 10 minutes of peace to talk more in-depth about how drunk and ridiculous she is)
  3. Do not worry about continuing a conversation with her, simply nod your head periodically as you make conversation with your friends and she makes conversation with herself.
As a side note, any successful attempts at trapping this girl underneath the cabbage patch kid statue will result in a semesters-worth scholarship and credit for the class "Bouncing 101: How to get rid of bar peripherals."

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