Monday, April 27, 2009

JPatt tries Reverseaverse

In my support of the advanced physics theory of Reverseaverse, I show you pet bunny Sasquatch is a Nazi in cartoon Reverseaverse:

See, this is him in Reverseaverse because in real life Sas lurvs Chancellor Steven and also luuurves the gays. A Nazi bunny, however...

And the Director of Lulztography taking lulzy photos at the SoMoToHo:

...becomes this in Reverseaverse:

Hmm it turns out that neither Mal nor our cherished Director of Lulztography change very much in Reverseaverse. Interesting. I will point out some subtle differences. First, Justin would never drink wine from the glass. Glasses are for sissies. This is obvi how we do it in Guantamontrose. Secondly, Justin doesn't own leather shoes. In fact, I think his Converse All Stars may be permanently attached to his feet. You know, the canvas and skin just kinda grew together after a while and... gross. Third, Justin wouldn't be caught dead in baggy black pants with a hole in them. No, no, he opts for ironic tight white pants from Turkey.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Good Decisions vs. Bad Decisions from the Dean

  • Good decision: drinking 16 individual bottles of sunny D with a shot of vodka in each over a 5hr period of time
  • Good decision: following this up with illegal substances and a fun-sized white chocolate kit-kat
  • Good decision: befriending a nice guy with a tazmanian devil sweatshirt on, accessing tall-boys, and making your way to an off-campus establishment
  • Bad decision: changing plans mid-drive and going to taz's house. that ends up being a t-hut.
  • Good decision: getting up and leaving, buying a jar of tostito's queso and a bag of tostito's at the gas station, and going home to eat it

Thursday, April 23, 2009

The Reverseaverse Lives On

Some more Reverseaverse:

Monorail Jtoy meets:

Monorail Kendra (Girls Next Door).



Amy Winehouse... or Mal/me on a bad day?

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Reverseaverse Attempt

checkout this notsuoH blog entry...with Tim playing the role of the loveable notsuoH owner

Friday, April 10, 2009

Important Questions 101

Make sure you ask whoever is allowing you to sleep on her futon about the creatures on any throw blankets she forces you to use. In general it's always helpful to ask:

"Are there dogs on that blanket?"

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

UGMo Ladies in the Reverseaverse

The Reverseaverse is a concept, somewhat hard to define, developed by myself and the distinguished Emeritus Professor of LULZ (my BFF Clay), who should be flying in for a weeklong lecture series just before the end of the term. Students interested in earning a PhD in LULZ should plan to attend his lectures, where you will learn about the advanced coursework required. It will be in one of these courses that the secrets of the Reverseaverse will be revealed to you, but until then, I present to you the following photographic example:

Ex. 1: Strip Beer Pong - JPatt, JToy, and Mal in the Reverseaverse

As you can see, these ladies like to have fun, much like their real-life counterparts, but there are some differences like the fact that the Reverseaverse ladies are not so much ladies and instead are basically fugly skanks. Also note that JPatt does not smoke, JToy wears a bikini top with a vest over it not an ill-fitting saggy bra, and Mal doesn't stick items like Menthols and her phone in her bra...oh wait, maybe she does. Some things never change, even in the Reverseaverse!

If you need some extracurricular reading material, I recommend familiarizing yourself with the blog on which I found this gem of a photo: Sorry I Missed Your Party. Bonus points if you manage to appear in a photo posted on the site. I personally have not been featured yet, but my former kitchen has!

Special Topics class

With early registration for the Fall 09 semester quickly approaching, we are pleased to inform students of a new Special Topics class in the Uni’s Macro department: “National LULZism: Macros of WW2, the Third Reich, and anti-Semitism.” The class will explore the long and illustrious history of such macros from their earliest appearances on the interwebs:

to more contemporary pieces:

Each macro will be examined and critiqued by the students, using LOLgic, Whut?, and “OMG, that’s so racist!”, to determine how macros such as these:

bring the LULZ and to what extent.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Strip Clubbing 199

Steps for Success:

1. Go on a Tuesday
2. Go to a club with a clever name, like "Teasers"
3. Have 9 beers so that when the "i don't touch you, you don't touch me [with anything but my butt]" rule is broken you are able to handle it
4. Do not intervene when "Sparkle" grabs your [girl] friend's crotch, bites her ear, and licks her face.
5. Pour beer down your own back when Sparkle decides it's your turn for an unsolicited lap dance.
6. Do not protest when Sparkle asks you to spank her.
7. Do not protest when Sparkle asks you to try again because apparently your first attempt wasn't your best work.
8. React positively to her constructive criticism that you "obviously don't know what you're doing."
9. Do not get angry when your friends call Sparkle over and rope you into buying her a drink.
10. Talk to Sparkle about her life goals and how she does real estate on the side.
11. Agree to a private dance on a couch because you assume it is compensation for buying the stripper a drink.
12. Make small talk with Sparkle about DSW shoe warehouse and other fun, wholesome, daytime activities.
13. Get a lap dance to Notorious B.I.G.'s Big Papa, realize the lap dance was $25 and go to the atm at the front while all your friends point and laugh.